I am Woman, Hear Me Roar

... and bitch, and manipulate. a lot.

I had a revelation today. Perhaps I should've had such a revelation quite some time ago. Oh well. While I take pride in the fact that I'm a fighter and not one to sit there and take whatever it is that is dished out to me, I realized today that my perfected "bitch" attitude can be more hurtful than sometimes I intend it to be. Not always, don't get me wrong. More often than not, it is more than deserved. Sometimes, however, I say things I know will cut the deepest or get the reaction I'm seeking and afterwards regret receiving. It happens.

My Methods, My Secrets:
I'll preface this by saying that there is one of two ways I win an argument. Everyone has their own master technique... these are mine...

1) I know I'm not the only one who needs to scream and throw curse words to the wind every now and again. If the situation arises that such scene is needed, have no fear, I'll be the Classy one to throw such a fit. I find that even through emotions and anger, I am almost always on my toes and am able to come out with the last word. Very quick-witted, if you will. I like this about myself, I won't lie.

2) Used more often than the latter, my non-chalant passive tone and my "cool" (cold bitch) persona is the one I realized today gets me into the most trouble. If you know me, you know exactly what I'm referring to, if not, you probably have one yourself that you can compare it with. I can be very condescending and hurtful. Please don't take me the wrong way here. I'm not a terrible person. I'm a real person. I have my guards up just as any other girl would. But I am fully aware that words are powerful and that in the end, there are times when I can go one step too far. Once again, it happens.

Okay, so there you have it. Secrets some wait quite some time to figure out when it comes to playing hard ball with Classy. I would also like to add, however, that I am not afraid to apologize when I know I'm in the wrong either. I might want you to apologize first,... stubborn... but if I did cross that line, I'll admit to it.

Anyway, I thought I would share. I can be relatively caniving. For this, I'm sorry. At least I'm aware of it. And moreso, I admit to it! Perhaps it's a learned trait... or perhaps a characteristic I've developed on my own in my twenty plus years of livlihood. Whatever. Such is life.




"She's a lover, baby and a fighter..." -Red Hot Chili Peppers

Truth Be Told

Sometimes I just want to start a fight. Honestly. Classy, yes? Not quite. I'm not talking about "white trash-let me kick someone's ass-pull hair-scratch and spit-beat down," I don't do that. I'm just in a need to scream a little... Maybe one slap. Just one!

It's been one of those weekends... not a bad weekend, per se, but a weekend where I've just been in a mood. Every man in my life is on my last nerve in one way or another. Mr. Perfect has been Mr. PMS for the past few days. I'm not sure if he's not getting enough sleep or his daily dose of calcium, but whatever the case might be, I'm over it. Rico also knows how to get under my skin when he feels it necessary. I'm over that too. Then there are the select few ladies in my life that are driving me crazy as well. Diva came up this weekend and I'm always glad to see a face from home. But she became quite inebriated last night and her filter basically shut down after that. I was quite annoyed by the end of the evening. Basically, I'm just fed up.

Last night, I went to my Halloween party of the weekend... a day late in order to also make it a birthday party for one of our friends. It was enjoyable. I looked good. That was a plus. But I was so aggravated by everyone for the majority of the evening, I hardly would say it was as much fun as I remember house parties being in college. In any case, it was fine I guess. I'm just in a mood. A state of mind, if you will. You've been there... you know you have. I'm ready for some alone time. Or some time to spend with those who understand me a little more than some have proven to this weekend. Hope you have had a Happy Halloween weekend! Here's to a new week!